Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize