Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
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