I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Let's make this a nightly thing. You'll explain the Watergate scandal like you're telling me a bedtime story while I eat popcorn high as fuck
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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