dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I’M PUT OFF FROM FOOD RN BC EARLIER I GOT SOME WATER AND I WAS 4 SIPS IN WHEN I NOticed A FUCKING BURGER KING F R Y IN MY D R I N K
Randomize