At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Randomize
