we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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