All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
