Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
