Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
Randomize
