you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
