His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
