Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
So I figured out why that guy from Tinder stopped messaging me back. He got married.
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
