Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
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