therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
So vagazzling was a success
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
Randomize
