wat bout pragnant strippers??
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
she pinky promised me she was 18
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I had sex for the second time today and ate an entire bag of alligator jerky on the way home. These truly are the golden years.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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