So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
