are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
sex in a hospital.. check
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
