the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
