I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
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