we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize