Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
