This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Is that strawberry winking at me??
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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