i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Farmville is her only friend.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
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