i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
