Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
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