I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
