legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize
