just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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