i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
