He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
