this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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