Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize