I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
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