You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
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