apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???