how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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