he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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