Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
