don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
