just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Randomize
