you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
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