my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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