yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
They are going to name an STD after you.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
