i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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