I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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