so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
I'm bleeding and have questions
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Randomize
