did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Every concussion has its silver lining
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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