I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
