I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
