we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
