The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
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